Muthoni Kariuki Blog

Mistakes of a campus girl

Posted by Edward Karani , Monday, April 26, 2010 6:43 AM

Anne got ready for her date, with Andrew (hooked), they had talked the previous day, and he was delighted to her out that evening. Initially she was thrilled, no guy had ever taken her out ever since she was admitted to campus, yet it was tiresome watching her roommate and friends go on endless dates, and now here was a man who was willing to do a lot for her. She needed the money, for a better life in campus, as well as for her dreams. Now seeing a young beautiful African lady walking around in the arms of an old white man, it all kind of made sense to her, it not seem so evil as it did in the past. Even her Christian friends thought there was nothing wrong with dating for money.

“ Be in charge.” She reminded herself. “Choose the place, not him.”

Anne felt guilty, she had told her friends that he had asked her out, yet it was her who had actually called Andrew, she had ignored his calls all the while but this time, she had decided that she was tired of being the ordinary campus Christian chick, the one who had no life, even in SPICE (campus fellowship) every one was dating. Just that Wednesday during spice fellowship they had brought Spice Alumni who had dated in Campus and were now married. There was no way she could come out with only one degree. She smiled at herself.

In first year they had been advised to graduate with at least two degrees, the campus one and at least a spouses, lecturers it seemed that it her department they had married someone they had studied with in campus. The shortest girl in her class, who was barely four feet, was dating someone, And there she was at 5 feet 5 and still single, she was beautiful and with long hair. Maybe her dressing was what was letting her down. She did dress a bit conservatively. If only she had the courage to show a little bit more skin.

Later that evening she seated with Andrew in Better Nyama Choma in Githurai, it was a fancy place though; they had beautiful secluded thatched but open huts that ensured some privacy. She had assumed that Andrew would take her to a place around town. When they had met in Moi Avenue as they had agreed, he had told her to follow him, for a surprise, he had started walking even before she could protest. It was already six in the evening and she still wanted to go home. Anne had never been to Githurai before and she had no idea what she would do, if Andrew bailed on her, after all she only had 100 shillings with her. She was afraid of what could happen to her, she did not know Andrew at all, and no one knew exactly where she was. She wanted to tell him when they were in the matatu, that she wanted to go back but her stretch failed her.

“It’s not far, we will be there before you know it.” He had reassured as he took her hand. She noticed he had removed his wedding ring.

“Where could it be? Why did he take it off?”

He had held on to her hand tightly all through the journey. The only thing she noticed was the outline the ring had left on his finger. Meaning it had been there for quite a long time.

She felt that everyone in that matatu was condemning her, yet they did not know her. From her assessment Andrew seemed to be at least forty years.

She waited for the Nyama choma to come anxiously; she was not even looking at Andrew who was looking admiringly at her.

“ So.” He began.

She turned to look at him.

“As you already know I am married.” He smiled.

She looked at him, and tired to smile.

“Do you have any children,” she asked him.

“ Yes,” he smiled as he took out his phone. “Two girls, both in pre-unit.”

The expression on Anne’s face changed. “Oh no, I don’t want to see their faces.” She said to herself thinking he wanted to show her the faces of his children.

He took out his phone and looked at the watch, he thought of his pregnant wife at home and their two daughters, she would have to wait for him that night. He had heard that girls from the University of Nairobi were very easy; he was just about to find out how easy.

The waiter came with some Delmonte juice and two glasses, he placed them on their table and poured some juice for them. Anne had thought she would enjoy the date but her conscious was killing her. Soon the waiter left them all alone again, Andrew was still staring at her.



They smiled at each other, though; Anne’s smile was forced.

“There’s a third one on the way.” He said in a by the way tone.

That took one by surprise, the thought of the pregnant wife at home, killed her spirits completely. How could she do these, what was she doing there in the first place. She took her juice and gobbled almost half the glass the down. He also had two small daughters that just killed her morale, why would he want to cheat on his wife. As she placed the glass down, she realized he was still looking at her.

“ Oh no!” she muttered.

“Won’t your wife be worried?” She looked at her phone; it was almost seven in the evening at it was becoming dark anyway.

He laughed, making her feel foolish.

“I am the man in the house, remember.” He told her. “ I will tell her I was working late.”

She went back to her juice; all over sudden she felt the desire of wanting to know more about Andrew. She looked up to him.

“She is very moody, you know how pregnant women are.” He leaned closer and whispered. “Plus, I am not getting any, and the way I love SEX.”

Anne wanted to smile but she could not, she quickly reached for the packet of juice and poured some more in her glass.

“Let me give it to you.” He suggested, as Anne was about to take a sip of her glass. She looked at him not knowing what to say.

“Ah.” She began.

“No!” she said. “No thank you.”

She looked away.

“Come seat next to me.” He begged her.

“No,” she resisted him. Then she remembered she did not have enough money to get her home. “I can’t, I am okay where I am.” She tried to be really nice to him.

“Okay.” He had a child like expression on his face. “ Promise, the next glass you will allow me to give it to you.”

She quickly agreed, knowing very well, promising herself that was the last glass she was taking, the waiter came again with the roasted meat and began to cut it up. Since he was standing between them and leaning over the table. Anne was happy that she could not see his face, it was like a breathe of fresh air. She could not believe that she was out on a date with a married man, she wanted to cry, she had always told herself that she would send any married man who tried to approach her to hell. Anne was lost in her thoughts she did before she knew it her glass was empty.

Andrew took a piece of meat and leaned over to give it to her. She opened her mouth to receive it.

“Have some more juice.” He took the packet and refilled her glass. She did not resist, she took the glass and placed it on her mouth.

“That’s one mine,” he gently took the glass just as she was about to drink. “You promised remember.”

Anne knew she was trapped; she had fallen right into his trap. “Why do you want to feed me?”

He shook his head. “You promised.”

Anne breathed in then walked and sat next to Andrew, she tried to sit at the edge of the seat so as not to feel the his body next to her, he placed his arm around her as he fed her the juice. After two sips, she took the glass and put it down.

“That’s enough.” She smiled. She took her glass and walked back to her seat.

“She is running a hundred miles an hour

In the wrong direction

She is trying but the canyon’s ever widening

In the depths of her cold heart

Does anybody hear her?

Can anybody see?

Or does anybody

Even know she is going down today.”

“ What would you like from me?” he asked her. “Because, if you are nice to me, I will nice to you. I know you are in campus and you need money. I can help you know.”

Her strength was slowly but surely coming back, she now knew she could never date a married man; her heart couldn’t simply let her.

“Well, you are a married man.” She started, “you have a wife, and I respect that, so all I want is your friendship.”

Andrew looked devastated, Anne looked down on the meat on the table smiling.

“In your face.”

By the time she looked at Andrew again, he seemed to have regained his confidence. She breathed in disappointed.

“ I understand.” He responded. “But.”

She looked at him.

“I love honesty and I know we are both human beings.” He smiled suggestively at her. Anne knew what he was about to say. “ I know we both have needs, sexual needs.”

The old fear was back, she thought of a wife and two daughters at home. She simply could not go out with this man. Before she knew it, he was holding her hand.

“If you ever want to talk about sex,” he told her as he rubbed her hand. “ Please let me know.”

She just smiled at him nervously.

“ Have you ever been tested for HIV?” he asked suddenly.

Anne did not answer him immediately. “Why?”

Later that night as she sat in her room thinking of her date with Andrew. She was staring at her bible, which she quickly put away, she could feel tears flooding her eyes, and she was slowly fading away. She could not believe that she had changed so much, she had no idea what kind of person she had become, and soon she was sobbing.

“I have to finish school soon.” She thought. “ I cannot do this,” She crawled into her bed and cried. Lost in her thoughts. She thought of the vow that she had made before coming to campus about sex and abstinence; she felt she had betrayed herself. She was afraid of committing a mistake that she would regret for the rest of her life. She looked at the 1000 shillings on her bed that Andrew had given her. Just as she was crying, her door swung open; quickly Anne sat down on her bed and quickly wiped away her tears. Mercy came in; she was also crying too, she looked horrible. Anne forgot all about her pain and turned to Mercy.

“Uko poa? (Are you okay?)” She turned, a bit shocked.

Mercy came in and sat on Anne’s bed. Anne moved closer to her best friend and placed her arm around her.

“I can’t take it anymore.” Mercy sobbed. Anne could feel tears clouding her eyes, in an instance she had forgotten all about her pain, and now wanted to know what could be making her friend so sad.

“Why? What is going on?”

“Anne! Anne!” she sobbed, and then she turned and looked at Anne, with a brutal look of honesty. “ I am positive.”

Anne was taken aback. What did Mercy mean, was she HIV positive? She slowly took her arm off Mercy...